Time to get started!

My life has suddenly changed dramatically and things are happening very fast. The time has come for me to make, and stand by, my choices and be able to find acceptance. I’m excited to learn about gemcodes. I can’t wait to get started!!!!

My intentions…
• To find the goddess within.
• To choose to be strong – to tap into the universal energy.
• To choose to be healthy (I have arthritis and could stand to lose some weight)
• To choose to be successful and, in turn, be able to teach others to succeed

• increase my income.

• To choose to open up to emotional healing / deal with anger and forgiveness• To choose to increase musical proficiency and share the gift of music (I am a singer / guitarist / songwriter). I believe that music is prayer and heals the world.
• To choose to open up and rediscover my personal nature.

• To be a rockin' great partner

• To choose to find and be able to show happiness.
• To choose to be a shining example - letting others know that life has everything to offer and so more.
• To choose share my gifts and lead others to share.
• To choose to live in light and love with compassion for others.

Now to begin plotting my future using the gemcodes. Can't wait to get started!

Chin up carry on

I am so very sad to write this...Robert has moved on.

What can I say? I came home and listened to Ricky Nelson sing Lonesome Town about a hundred times. The dog is broken hearted too, she picks up her ears at every sound hoping he'll walk back through that door... I don't know how he could do this? I guess...whatever...something, it was too much, probably my fault, I don't know...chin up, carry on.

Way down in lonesome town...
Laurabythelake

So long 2011

This has been NOT been a great year, as far as years go.

Trying to dig out what was good...not so easy. There was summer...and now Christmas.

Glenda and I started selling jewellery together... I started making jewellery again. I finished my song Love is Beautiful...

I guess the important thing about this year is that I started to be a person again. I was frozen in 2010 - as you may have noted by the lack of posts for that particular year of my life. That I managed to become unfrozen is a good thing. By frozen I mean I had post tramatic stress syndrome PTSD. Something I had to deal with. Now - to be a person? What sort of person will I become? Where did my old self go? What's changed? I know I have more steps on this journey of becoming unfrozen.

I feel sad - this has been a sad year.

So what's with the photo? He is a Tonner 17" "Strider" doll, a fabulous custom repaint by the lovely "Gillygals". He has a tattoo that says "No Regrets"..from my song No Regrets - No Goodbyes.

and so I will say so long 2011...

Soooo, what do I know about Dogs?

Tana, Hearts Treasure, Devon Rex, Baby, has crossed the bridge. I can write that, but I'm unwilling to accept it. A tiny cat, she has left a huge hole I am sorely afraid of... trying not to feel angry, afraid of what comes next...trying to make sense of no sense, and finally, loss.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I have heard: "First the Creator sees in his mind - and so it becomes"

A fuzzy white dog began to take shape in my brain. Funny thing. Turns out she is a Palamino Chinese Crested. Blindingly white with reddish freckles and one golden ear, she is Keiko -"beloved" in Japanese. Keiko was born on February 18, 2009. Her first day of living with us began May 31st. On that date, it rained in Toronto. For the first time in my life I saw double rainbows - a complete storybook ending in the lake outside my kitchen window. Wow.
(bow-wow?)

Robert and I have watched the Dog Whisperer (my personal hero) daily for 3 years, including back-to-back episodes of reruns - all wonderful. I realize now, we have NO CLUE. Our cat energy is not suitable for a puppy. We must somehow take charge...

Puppy Class begins June 29.

New Year Welcome...

This morning I called my elderly father. He sounded terrible. I couldn't understand a word he was saying!

Father lives 200 km away, Fearing the worst, I immediately phoned my sister who lives near him asking her to check up on him right away - which she did. She relayed his response " I didn't have my teeth in, you dumb twit". Yep. He's okay.

This is how the new year starts. My back is complaining bitterly. At work I have been given several high level projects that, due to the financial climate, will be nearly impossible to complete.

Commercial television is horrible. People publicly demeaning themselves for the entertainment of others or for money is, in my opinion, pornography. How did we arrive...?

And...financial chaos looms large: doom doom doom. Whatever that means. (I probably don't want to find out.) To me, the only real money I have is in my pocket.

What are my aspirations for this year? Well, lets just make it through the day first.

Laura by the Lake

Travelling at the Speed of Love

Love is faster than Light - I read that.

I thought I saw myself at the Atrium the other day. I was rushing and late for an appt. Adjusting my glasses, sure enough, there I was, looking back towards myself over my shoulder. The "old" me didn't recognize the "new" me. Not too surprizing - that I don't recognize myself these days.
Yep - it was definately me - not just a glancing look alike.

I suppose I have left more than a few ghosts wandering in the marbled corridors of Toronto's #1 trade route - The Eaton Centre. I'm certain it was the "me" that attended the San Diego Comic Convention in- in - um - when was it? Well anyways, I recognized the linen pants I was wearing during that particular summer of my life.

And now I am in the middle of another summer and approaching a birthday. Unsure and fumbling, I attempt to re-invent: an army of troll dolls; an armada of Furby's; enough Pullips, Blythes and dollfie's to horrify any monster movie lover. And now...tada...rubber stamps. Last summer it was gesneriads...

Sometimes I have panic attacks. I hear voices calling when I run the shower, I hope I don't fall down, I forget good things. Stuff I only wish I could forget - plays in a loop in my brain.

I read about things I don't understand, and, I'm beginning to believe that one day I will understand and then everything will be somewhere travelling at the speed of love.

Did I mention I saw myself...?

Target and Doc

Friday February 8, 2008, Target crossed over the Rainbow Bridge. We miss him badly. He was our Best boy.

On Jun 19th a new member will join our family. His name is Doc. He is a Napoleon cat. Part Persian / part munchkin... He is the first in our next gen cats.

I am hoping he will be a good companion for Baby, our own 5 year old Devon Spooky Chic. She likes babies and boys, and prefers to remain on the outside of our cat family.

I picked Doc's breed because when I saw his picture...I laughed out loud. Trying to find "a replacement" for Bigs was too tough. There are no replacements. I was seriously pouring over the pictures and breeds trying to "find a face" and suddenly I realized "serious" wasn't the way to go. I needed a good laugh. I realized this little guy was the remedy - take a look for yourself :)

a) it's a very cool looking breed b) it's a new breed c) it's completely different from Target.

There's a certain freedom - the new guy won't remind us of "Bigs" (Target's other name - or, one of many.) Read the breed profile. Apparently, Napoleon are sweet natured (as are Munchkins). Sheesh, another whodathunkit? I guess we can never really know what comes next.

I would never have figured ME as a cat person...devon rex...or munckin aka napoleon type and whoaaaaaaaaaa - Persian?

The Furby factory is progressing. I have also acquired an army of Trolls. I have great plans for these. I hope that they will teach me how to make dolls.

The weekend-before-last, I took a jewelry course with my sister. It was great. Sometimes I wonder why I'm so wildly plunging into the surf. It has occurred to me, I am trying to find my future. I know - I know, it's always the most (not-so) obvious thing...and that's it.

I guess my future is that I will always be searching for the next thing.

(but not my heart - my heart has found home)