Love is faster than Light - I read that.
I thought I saw myself at the Atrium the other day. I was rushing and late for an appt. Adjusting my glasses, sure enough, there I was, looking back towards myself over my shoulder. The "old" me didn't recognize the "new" me. Not too surprizing - that I don't recognize myself these days.
Yep - it was definately me - not just a glancing look alike.
I suppose I have left more than a few ghosts wandering in the marbled corridors of Toronto's #1 trade route - The Eaton Centre. I'm certain it was the "me" that attended the San Diego Comic Convention in- in - um - when was it? Well anyways, I recognized the linen pants I was wearing during that particular summer of my life.
And now I am in the middle of another summer and approaching a birthday. Unsure and fumbling, I attempt to re-invent: an army of troll dolls; an armada of Furby's; enough Pullips, Blythes and dollfie's to horrify any monster movie lover. And now...tada...rubber stamps. Last summer it was gesneriads...
Sometimes I have panic attacks. I hear voices calling when I run the shower, I hope I don't fall down, I forget good things. Stuff I only wish I could forget - plays in a loop in my brain.
I read about things I don't understand, and, I'm beginning to believe that one day I will understand and then everything will be somewhere travelling at the speed of love.
Did I mention I saw myself...?
Friday, July 11, 2008
Monday, June 2, 2008
Target and Doc
Friday February 8, 2008, Target crossed over the Rainbow Bridge. We miss him badly. He was our Best boy.
On Jun 19th a new member will join our family. His name is Doc. He is a Napoleon cat. Part Persian / part munchkin... He is the first in our next gen cats.
I am hoping he will be a good companion for Baby, our own 5 year old Devon Spooky Chic. She likes babies and boys, and prefers to remain on the outside of our cat family.
I picked Doc's breed because when I saw his picture...I laughed out loud. Trying to find "a replacement" for Bigs was too tough. There are no replacements. I was seriously pouring over the pictures and breeds trying to "find a face" and suddenly I realized "serious" wasn't the way to go. I needed a good laugh. I realized this little guy was the remedy - take a look for yourself :)
a) it's a very cool looking breed b) it's a new breed c) it's completely different from Target.
There's a certain freedom - the new guy won't remind us of "Bigs" (Target's other name - or, one of many.) Read the breed profile. Apparently, Napoleon are sweet natured (as are Munchkins). Sheesh, another whodathunkit? I guess we can never really know what comes next.
I would never have figured ME as a cat person...devon rex...or munckin aka napoleon type and whoaaaaaaaaaa - Persian?
The Furby factory is progressing. I have also acquired an army of Trolls. I have great plans for these. I hope that they will teach me how to make dolls.
The weekend-before-last, I took a jewelry course with my sister. It was great. Sometimes I wonder why I'm so wildly plunging into the surf. It has occurred to me, I am trying to find my future. I know - I know, it's always the most (not-so) obvious thing...and that's it.
I guess my future is that I will always be searching for the next thing.
(but not my heart - my heart has found home)
On Jun 19th a new member will join our family. His name is Doc. He is a Napoleon cat. Part Persian / part munchkin... He is the first in our next gen cats.
I am hoping he will be a good companion for Baby, our own 5 year old Devon Spooky Chic. She likes babies and boys, and prefers to remain on the outside of our cat family.
I picked Doc's breed because when I saw his picture...I laughed out loud. Trying to find "a replacement" for Bigs was too tough. There are no replacements. I was seriously pouring over the pictures and breeds trying to "find a face" and suddenly I realized "serious" wasn't the way to go. I needed a good laugh. I realized this little guy was the remedy - take a look for yourself :)
a) it's a very cool looking breed b) it's a new breed c) it's completely different from Target.
There's a certain freedom - the new guy won't remind us of "Bigs" (Target's other name - or, one of many.) Read the breed profile. Apparently, Napoleon are sweet natured (as are Munchkins). Sheesh, another whodathunkit? I guess we can never really know what comes next.
I would never have figured ME as a cat person...devon rex...or munckin aka napoleon type and whoaaaaaaaaaa - Persian?
The Furby factory is progressing. I have also acquired an army of Trolls. I have great plans for these. I hope that they will teach me how to make dolls.
The weekend-before-last, I took a jewelry course with my sister. It was great. Sometimes I wonder why I'm so wildly plunging into the surf. It has occurred to me, I am trying to find my future. I know - I know, it's always the most (not-so) obvious thing...and that's it.
I guess my future is that I will always be searching for the next thing.
(but not my heart - my heart has found home)
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Where's Furby now?
Toronto: Furbruary. The shortest month is also the coldest. Never mind...
This past few days I've become obsessed with Furby and his cousin Shelby. I don't know how I ever missed these before. Why in the heck did Hasbro stop making them?
Well, they ARE pretty chatty, especially the ones without off switches; and, they BURN through batteries. But they are completely adorable, especially Shelby. Keep your eyes open for the hard to come by dictionary!
And now, micro pets! Another cool toy sadly now out of production at Tomy. What's a kid to do..?
Anyway, I have acquired a small army of furby and shelby's, marshalled from the corners of the world, summoned by the siren's of ebay. They should arrive any day now (20 bankers' boxes of unboxed Furbys coming from England). This is sure to raise some eyebrows around the house...ohhhh yah.
My other recently acquired robotic device, Roomba, is keeping the cats occupied at home. I'm quite impressed with the way Roomba always manages to find the way back to it's cradle... I think it will make a good vehicle for Robosaurus. Sadly, Robosaurus was NEVER able to walk, I was reluctant to banish him to the island of unwanted toys.
Speaking of the isle of unwanted toys, I'm thinking about getting a website. A chance at a new life for my retired toy friends.
It's getting a bit crowded in the cupboard these days.
This past few days I've become obsessed with Furby and his cousin Shelby. I don't know how I ever missed these before. Why in the heck did Hasbro stop making them?
Well, they ARE pretty chatty, especially the ones without off switches; and, they BURN through batteries. But they are completely adorable, especially Shelby. Keep your eyes open for the hard to come by dictionary!
And now, micro pets! Another cool toy sadly now out of production at Tomy. What's a kid to do..?
Anyway, I have acquired a small army of furby and shelby's, marshalled from the corners of the world, summoned by the siren's of ebay. They should arrive any day now (20 bankers' boxes of unboxed Furbys coming from England). This is sure to raise some eyebrows around the house...ohhhh yah.
My other recently acquired robotic device, Roomba, is keeping the cats occupied at home. I'm quite impressed with the way Roomba always manages to find the way back to it's cradle... I think it will make a good vehicle for Robosaurus. Sadly, Robosaurus was NEVER able to walk, I was reluctant to banish him to the island of unwanted toys.
Speaking of the isle of unwanted toys, I'm thinking about getting a website. A chance at a new life for my retired toy friends.
It's getting a bit crowded in the cupboard these days.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
of haunted bathrooms...
Where to begin…
Somewhere along the way I discovered I could see, what I can only conclude to be, ghosts. Yep, guess that totally qualifies me as a weirdo. Sorry - I know what I know – that’s it. It’s not like I asked… I am compelled to be truthful. Ask anybody.
Anyway, my sister is visiting me – hurray!!!! She rarely visits. We had a GREAT weekend. Being the weirdy weirdos we are, we spent our time looking at crystals and making jewelry.
I have a lovely crystal cluster that belonged to our mother. I asked my sister to take a look and spend some time with it. (Mom always liked her best.) When it was time to end the evening, Glenda, my sister, offered to let me try her Redfeather spray (for arthritis). BTW – it’s great.
She sprayed my lower back – the cold spray was a real shock - I turned it into a sexy dance :)))
At the same time, I spilled my glass of water all over the kitchen floor…hilarity ensued. That being done and cleaned up, I once again announced my intentions for bed and proudly showed off my new water container – as featured on the Oprah show. Very fancy – hummingbirds et al. Note: The cats (we have 5) like to stick their paws in my water glass, spilling water into my precious bedside reading bin…and so, the fancy water bottle.
Proudly, I showed Glenda the locking cap mechanism, turning the bottle upside down to show how it protected from spillage. For some reason, the cap was unlocked and water poured (again) all over the kitchen. Once again, hilarity. As I wiped up my mess, I saw my mother’s crystal on the kitchen counter. This was precisely the type of madcap humour she loved. Hmmm. My sister commented that Mother must be watching us.
My spousal unit - BFF, Robert, feeds his old cat Target in the downstair’s bathroom. This is due mainly to the other cats who eat all the food before Target can get any. Lately, the paper towel Robert so tidely puts the cat food dish on has been totally SOAKED with water after Target’s feeding. There is no water bowl in this room. Target isn’t wet – the floor isn’t wet – where the hell did the water come from?
And now this…
Today I came home for lunch to visit my sister one last time before she leaves for her home. We both washed our hands in the downstair’s bathroom (being well brought up). The bathroom was tidy. I was the last one to wash my hands (again) before returning to work. I noticed a large (really large) smudge of runny yuck on the mirror. It wasn’t there before lunch. My sister said she didn’t see it on the mirror just moment before when she was using the bathroom…it was impossible to miss. It ran both up and down, rather than just down. It also had a dimensional quality to it. It had depth. At first it looked kinda’ like a hand – but then we thought - more like a foot with toes delineated by many very fine capillary type lines. To our amazement, while we watched, the smudge appeared to clear and then shifted it’s shape. We took some digital photos – in the photos it appeared like a windowy type hole.
Sisters, no one else would believe this weirdness. Could be… ectoplasm?
Post: Robert asked “what up” with the mirror. He calmly asserted that he thought it might be a visitor. (I love that man).
This morning the bathroom started manifesting a strange sound…weird.
THIS has never happened to me before.
Somewhere along the way I discovered I could see, what I can only conclude to be, ghosts. Yep, guess that totally qualifies me as a weirdo. Sorry - I know what I know – that’s it. It’s not like I asked… I am compelled to be truthful. Ask anybody.
Anyway, my sister is visiting me – hurray!!!! She rarely visits. We had a GREAT weekend. Being the weirdy weirdos we are, we spent our time looking at crystals and making jewelry.
I have a lovely crystal cluster that belonged to our mother. I asked my sister to take a look and spend some time with it. (Mom always liked her best.) When it was time to end the evening, Glenda, my sister, offered to let me try her Redfeather spray (for arthritis). BTW – it’s great.
She sprayed my lower back – the cold spray was a real shock - I turned it into a sexy dance :)))
At the same time, I spilled my glass of water all over the kitchen floor…hilarity ensued. That being done and cleaned up, I once again announced my intentions for bed and proudly showed off my new water container – as featured on the Oprah show. Very fancy – hummingbirds et al. Note: The cats (we have 5) like to stick their paws in my water glass, spilling water into my precious bedside reading bin…and so, the fancy water bottle.
Proudly, I showed Glenda the locking cap mechanism, turning the bottle upside down to show how it protected from spillage. For some reason, the cap was unlocked and water poured (again) all over the kitchen. Once again, hilarity. As I wiped up my mess, I saw my mother’s crystal on the kitchen counter. This was precisely the type of madcap humour she loved. Hmmm. My sister commented that Mother must be watching us.
My spousal unit - BFF, Robert, feeds his old cat Target in the downstair’s bathroom. This is due mainly to the other cats who eat all the food before Target can get any. Lately, the paper towel Robert so tidely puts the cat food dish on has been totally SOAKED with water after Target’s feeding. There is no water bowl in this room. Target isn’t wet – the floor isn’t wet – where the hell did the water come from?
And now this…
Today I came home for lunch to visit my sister one last time before she leaves for her home. We both washed our hands in the downstair’s bathroom (being well brought up). The bathroom was tidy. I was the last one to wash my hands (again) before returning to work. I noticed a large (really large) smudge of runny yuck on the mirror. It wasn’t there before lunch. My sister said she didn’t see it on the mirror just moment before when she was using the bathroom…it was impossible to miss. It ran both up and down, rather than just down. It also had a dimensional quality to it. It had depth. At first it looked kinda’ like a hand – but then we thought - more like a foot with toes delineated by many very fine capillary type lines. To our amazement, while we watched, the smudge appeared to clear and then shifted it’s shape. We took some digital photos – in the photos it appeared like a windowy type hole.
Sisters, no one else would believe this weirdness. Could be… ectoplasm?
Post: Robert asked “what up” with the mirror. He calmly asserted that he thought it might be a visitor. (I love that man).
This morning the bathroom started manifesting a strange sound…weird.
THIS has never happened to me before.
No Goodbyes
I have always wished that I could draw: blend pallets of colour. Watch the emergence of something totally new. I’ve always loved “the new”, but you would never guess it. Old clothes, older tunes, I always manage to purchase the same type of sweater over and over again – the same shoes - mainly because I have always dreaded endings.
The pain of letting go, for me, is... unbearable. In my own personal philosophy, there are NO endings. I’ve abolished them. So there.
As hard as I try, I can't help despair that one day I'll reach that particular fork in the road, the one from which there is no return. You are NOT correct if you are assuming that it’s death I am afraid of, at least not any more than anyone else.
It’s the finality of “The End”...of never seeing a sunset over a certain beach; forever closing a favourite book…Why is any of this important? I feel like have spent my entire time on this planet trying to find that which is real and true about my purpose here.
Endings are just not part of it: Beginnings start today.
And just how will I begin this glorious new day? Another January day bound to be as gray as it is long. Brain congested from the nightly turns of my subconscious, groping in the winter morning darkness, somehow I find a coffee (thanks b.) and prepare to welcome all that is new.
The pain of letting go, for me, is... unbearable. In my own personal philosophy, there are NO endings. I’ve abolished them. So there.
As hard as I try, I can't help despair that one day I'll reach that particular fork in the road, the one from which there is no return. You are NOT correct if you are assuming that it’s death I am afraid of, at least not any more than anyone else.
It’s the finality of “The End”...of never seeing a sunset over a certain beach; forever closing a favourite book…Why is any of this important? I feel like have spent my entire time on this planet trying to find that which is real and true about my purpose here.
Endings are just not part of it: Beginnings start today.
And just how will I begin this glorious new day? Another January day bound to be as gray as it is long. Brain congested from the nightly turns of my subconscious, groping in the winter morning darkness, somehow I find a coffee (thanks b.) and prepare to welcome all that is new.
The Memory of Water...
I've been reading Lynne McTaggert's book: The Intention Experiment. I've also just finished reading another of her other books: The Field - great book!
I was drawn by referances to the Emoto's series of books around The Memory of Water. What a wonderful theory! The pictures are beautiful. The idea is: you can positively affect water by communicating intentions i.e. writing words of love, faith, hope and inspiration on your cup.
It seems pretty strange, but not really very different from the creation of the universe beginning with "the word"...and thus, I am hoping to keep my new year's resolutions.
I was drawn by referances to the Emoto's series of books around The Memory of Water. What a wonderful theory! The pictures are beautiful. The idea is: you can positively affect water by communicating intentions i.e. writing words of love, faith, hope and inspiration on your cup.
It seems pretty strange, but not really very different from the creation of the universe beginning with "the word"...and thus, I am hoping to keep my new year's resolutions.
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